The Des Moines Register Editorial Board Considers The Constitution To Be A Phallic Symbol

The Des Moines Register's Editorial Broad have hit a new low with today's editorial titled "Is That A Constitution In Your Pocket?"  Here's an excerpt:

Carrying a small copy of the Constitution is the new thing in Washington, according to a recent article in the Wall Street Journal.

It may well be a response to tea party accusations that Congress has forgotten about the document. A bulge in a pocket may replace the flag lapel pin. It's a symbol of, well, we're not sure what.

This is a typical response of Asshole Left who do not care about the Constitution, don't understand what it is, and have never read it.  They just use it as toilet paper.

The Register's Editorial Board is comprised almost entirely of a bunch of leftist women with creative writing degrees, along with a beta male and a Gannettoid lifer who is boring as hell.

Then the piece descends into total madness:

The Constitution is more than 4,618 words plus 27 amendments. The original document - which endorsed slavery - cannot be read without the amendments. It also can't be understood without knowledge of the 220 years of Supreme Court interpretations of the document. Those interpretations maintain the integrity of the Constitution while reflecting the evolution of our people.

So carry it. Read it. Value it. But do not separate it from the history that shapes it.

This is bullshit and completely retarded.

Slavery was a reality at the time.  What do these dumbasses at the Register want?  To be able to hop in the Delorean Time Machine and change it?  You can't do that! 

Besides, Article I Section 9 ends importation of slaves.  That was a start.

What about the 13th Amendment?  How about the 14th Amendment?

What about the Civil War?

No, these ASSHOLES at the Register want to wallow in the fact that America once had slavery and use it to trash anybody who carries around the Constitution, quotes from the Amended Constitution, or does anything with it other than using it as toilet paper

Our politicians take an OATH and SWEAR to uphold the Constitution.  That's kind of a big fucking deal, don't you think, Laura Hollingsworth and crew?  So when you get politicians passing bills into law that they haven't fully read or understood the text of (or don't care), and which has provisions in them that are entirely unconstitutional (like the individual mandate to purchase health insurance) no wonder some of The People get upset!!!  What are we basing our laws on, anyway?  Whatever Rekha Basu or Andie Dominick agrees with?  Whatever sort of "victories" Obama can come up with?

Christ, how stupid are you idiots at the Register?  What a bunch of fucking morons.

Now they're trying to turn the Constitution into a phallic symbol.  Snicker snicker.  Isn't that funny?  We're so funny with our creative writing degrees and our asshole MORAL SUPERIORITY!

You know what, Register Editorial Bored?  You're a bunch of fucking losers.  Your political orthodoxy is a loser.  Your rabid partisan lifestyle is a loser.  Is it any wonder why subscribers and advertisers are leaving the Des Moines Register and other newspapers?  You only want to cater to the 14% of Iowans who classify themselves as "liberal", and fuck everybody else.  What a stupid business model that is.

I'm sure some of you ask, State 29, why do you even bother to look anymore?  I long ago quit subscribing to newspapers, and I'd been faithful for decades.  Why pay for bullshit?  It's been forever since I've advertised in a paper.  I do like to stay connected to the community and keep up with State news, and for that I check out the internet versions of newspapers, but as the leftists push the envelope further and further with their stupidity I wonder why I even bother.  Luckily, I don't click through any ads, plus I use ad blockers to eliminate what I can.  I certainly don't comment on anything online ever, except here in this space.

What to do?  I suppose I could give up and ignore everything, or I can fight back with words.  It sucks that Iowa's premiere newspaper has fallen into the shit.  You don't think it can go much lower than Manitoba Snowplow, but it does.  The Register equating the Constitution with a phallic symbol is stupid, mindless, and idiotic.  But then they are, aren't they?